The Emo Writer † The Imperfect Being

You are the apple of my eyes...

2011-12-12T04:57:00.000+08:00

Honestly, who will ever forget their high school sweetheart...?

Confession

2011-10-30T22:53:00.002+08:00

There is this moment that I could never forget for the rest of my life
The moment when she actually hugged me, telling me that she likes me
Until now I still can remember how it actually felt, the feeling of being loved by the one I love

The warmth is gone
And you can't ever have it again
Now you can't accept things like feelings
And change

Why was it so hard for us to get together
Yet so simple for us to break up
And I had actually always thought that we were meant to be together

Is it because we just weren't meant to be together?
Or because we didn't put in enough effort?
Or just because I initiated it?
I still couldn't understand the exact reason why did we break up

Time heals
Lies

The initial plan was just to bring you to a park, sit down and talk and spend some time together just for the two of us
Since we never really had spent much time together
But I thought that I could never make you happy myself
So I changed the plan and called others
But why did everything went so badly at the end of day
Did I really not do enough?

I had been working on a photo album all year long
Since it was the only thing that I am actually good at
It was half way done
It was planned for our first year anniversary
But what should I do with it now?

I had tried so many things to fix things back
But why did you have to left me alone on the day I was looking forward to
And after

I still couldn't get over everything
I just couldn't understand why
Second chance, ever?

We break up, it's something that we do now
Everyone has got to do it sometime
It's okay, let it go
Get out there and find someone

Happy Birthday, in advance
Seems like there is no need for me to be celebrating for you ever again
Cause I might only be ruining the day at the end of the day

Go far far away from me...

2011-05-16T00:04:00.001+08:00

Cause if you ever come back to me, I swear I will never let you go again.

I don't hate you, it's just that, my heart is broken...

2011-05-09T00:21:00.001+08:00

So miss me, send me love everytime you think of me, then drop it.

Emo post is emo...

2011-02-20T14:11:00.008+08:00

Dear Justin, please be grateful that at least she goes through and gets over it with you.

Sorry That I Loved You

2011-01-23T17:21:00.002+08:00

For all of the times that I tried for your smile,
For making you think that I was worth the while,
So your love, love, love, love, love, would be mine.

For sending you flowers and holding your hand,
That no one was there to take a stand,
But the love, love, love, made us blind.

And I'm so sorry that I hurt you,
Sorry that I fell through,
Sorry I was falling in love with you.
I'm sorry that I came true,
But sorry doesn't turn back time.
For all that I have done to you,
I wish that I could make it right.
So sorry that I loved you,
Sorry that I needed you,
Sorry that I held you tight.

And I'm sorry for making you love me and saying goodbye,
For being the one that taught you how to cry,
It was love, love, love, and it passed us by.

For giving you everything that you dreamed,
For taking it back when i fled the scene,
Sorry love, for wasting your time.

And I'm so sorry that I hurt you,
Sorry that I fell through,
Sorry I was falling in love with you.
I'm sorry that I came true,
But sorry doesn't turn back time.
For all that I have done to you,
I wish that I could make it right.
So sorry that I loved you,
Sorry that I needed you,
Sorry that I held you tight.

An apology now after all of this time,
Won't make any difference tonight.
But I'm hoping I'm sorry will open your mind,
To love, love, love, love,love, in your life.

Sorry that I hurt you,
Sorry that I fell through,
Sorry I was falling in love with you.
I'm sorry that I came true,
But sorry doesn't turn back time.
For all that I have done to you,
I wish that I could make it right.
Sorry that I hurt you,
Sorry that I fell through,
Sorry I was falling in love with you.
I'm sorry that I came true,
But sorry doesn't turn back time.
Sorry that I loved you,
Sorry that I hurt you,
I'm so sorry that I loved you,
I'm so sorry that I hurt you,
Sorry that I loved you.

So stop crying.

2010

2011-01-01T19:17:00.054+08:00

Days Without Melodies

2010-11-05T12:59:00.005+08:00

So, it had been ages since I last blogged.

Sloth

Oh wells, good thing is, no one visits this dead blog anymore.
Now I can finally be alone with my blog.
To express my inner self, my inner feelings, like what I used to do here.
I forgot how to blog though.
Blogging is never, ever an easy task.
Let's just keep things simple, not like anyone is visiting this blog anymore.

Happy in the club with a bottle of red wine
Stars in our eyes 'cause we're having a good time

No, I'm not okay.
I felt neglected.
No. I was neglected.
I'm deeply hurt.
She broke my heart.
I teared for 3 days, 3 nights.
My heart hurts.

'Cause I'm damaged, I'm damaged
Don't know what to do
Baby, I'm damaged, so, so, damaged
Because of you

Maybe the plan on that day wasn't good enough.
Whatever happens on that day wasn't even part of the plan.
Things just went to the wrong direction.
She had no idea.
How much I had to go through for that single day.
Time.
Effort.
Exam on the next day.
Yes, I failed my last 3 papers.
She hurts me so much till the point I couldn't concentrate and focus to study.
I don't expect anything in return.
I just wanna be loved.
Yet, all I got was a broken heart.

No, I'm not trying to be romantic.
I just wanted to make my loved one happy.
I just wanna see her smile.
I just wanna be closer to her.
I just wanna love her and be loved.
Yet, we are getting further apart.

She doesn't hold me anymore.
She doesn't text me anymore.
She doesn't talk to me anymore.
She doesn't call me anymore.
She doesn't hug me anymore.
She doesn't kiss me anymore.
Perhaps she has stopped loving me.
Perhaps she has no more feelings for me.
Who knows?

Yes, she does deserve better.
No, I'm not worth it.
But I have always trying to do my best for her all the time.
Someone told me to hold on to her.
Okay fine.
I did.
She's busy with her college. Fine, I shut up. I stopped complaining and just hold on to her.
She's always so tired. Fine, I shut up and stopped disturbing her.
She broke her promise again and again. Fine, I will just let it go again and again.
No, I'm not trying to put any blame on anyone.
It's just that my heart hurts and tired.
I'm the one suffocating at the very end.
I'm the one who got hurt the most at the end.
Well, it's not like anyone care.
And I don't need anyone to care.
I don't wanna feel pathetic.
I don't want people to pity me.
Knowing that I had to beg her to talk to her.
Well, it's not like she cares about me anymore.
She never cares how I feel.
When I said I don't care anymore, I just wanted her to care for me more.
I just wanna be loved.

No wonder she never believe in happy ending.
Since she's the one who ruins everything in the first place.

Maybe she has found someone else.
Maybe she has been lying to me.
Maybe I never had a position in her heart in the first place.
Yes, I come last after everyone else.
Is that where a boyfriend's position supposed to be?
She doesn't allow me to tell her this.
But, I trust her so much till the point I'm afraid that my trust will get betrayed.

Please be fair to me.
It has always been one sided.
No, I don't expect you to do anything.
I just wanna be loved.
Yet, I felt like a trash to you.

Maybe it costs so much and she needs a very long time to text me.
Maybe calling me is the same as above.
She has the money and time to text others.
Yet, she doesn't have the money and time to text me, to talk to me.
Yea, credit dies. I can see her texting the next day.
Maybe she was really telling the truth.
Either way, it's the same.
She broke my heart.

3 days, 3 nights.
It wasn't easy.
I had to lock myself from the world.
Just to feel better.
When night comes, it's all the same.
I teared. Yes, I did.
It just hurts so much.
Having a real needle poking my heart wouldn't have cause that much pain.
It feels like thousand of needles poking from the inside.
If anyone could stab me in my heart, I will be really grateful and thankful for that.
I would pay that person, cause he ended my misery, my miserable life.
I would make sure that person doesn't get sued or jailed.
Cause that person has just made me feel way better.

She was great.
She has changed, too much.
In my opinion, not for the better, but for the worse.
I have changed myself.
I was never whiny.
I was never a /k/-tard.
Yet, my fragile heart and feelings stay the same.
Cause either way.
She broke my heart.

Time heals.

The 100th Post

2010-10-18T21:51:00.005+08:00

A picture speaks a thousand words. ♥

Pain

2010-04-04T14:18:00.004+08:00

(Reserved)

2010-03-14T23:40:00.001+08:00

Some day when I will eventually break down, will you be there for me...?

2010-03-11T21:42:00.011+08:00

Just where are you when I really need you...

De Lon

First Month Anniversary

2010-02-25T05:27:00.002+08:00

Happy First Month Anniversary!
=)

Let us create memories and complete our story together.

050310

♥

De Lon

Gong Xi Valentine 2010~!

2010-02-14T17:38:00.007+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year & Happy Valentine's Day!

*Me*

♥

De Lon

24th January 2010

2010-01-24T22:40:00.005+08:00

National Compliment Day

Compliment Day is celebrated by offering sincere compliments to people you know. It is important that you are sincere. People will see right through insincerity, and you will do more harm than good.

A Date To Remember
♥

I ♥ you.
I'm such a lucky guy.
To have such a wonderful girlfriend being together with me.
I'm happy. =)

De Lon

2010

2010-01-10T14:19:00.007+08:00

Farewell

2009

Such Awesome & Wonderful Year =)

Welcome
2010
It started of being with the one I love ♥

Resolutions?
Don't intend to do anything much this year.

- Miss her, trust her, treat her as best as I could, give her as much happiness as I could, love her.
- Concentrate and focus on studies, score well.

♥

Thanks for the memories.

De Lon

21 Days

2009-12-22T23:29:00.024+08:00

22nd December 2009
She woke me up. We talked. She left. I'm supposed to go to my primary school gathering today. I didn't. Blehs. I stayed in my room whole day not knowing what to do, sleeping and dreaming. Worrying and missing. I feel so lifeless. I waited whole day for her to text me, hoping that she can reach Ireland as soon as possible safely. Blehs.

P/S: I miss you.

23rd December 2009
She texted me that she reached London at 0124 hours, still lining up at the immigration line. It had been about 15 hours of flight. Blehs. So long. At 0244 hours, she texted me that she couldn't catch her flight. So worrisome. Her sister's friend saved her. I feel so useless. Not being able to do anything. Only can stay at home worrying and missing her. And still she texted me not to worry about her, worrying about me that I will worry too much about her, telling me that everything will turn out alright even though she's alone in a foreign country. How nice. At 1244 hours, she texted me that she's going to catch her flight this time and told me to help her buy credits. Digi or maxis? Or hotlink? Hmmm. Got difference? At 1947 hours, she texted me that she reached Ireland safely (finally) and met up with her sisters. She said she's going to get a sore throat. That is her last message. Please be ok and take care. I stayed in my room whole day again. Blehs. I'm supposed to go to a primary school's friend's farewell today but I didn't. Well, we talked through msn. Hmmm, I just realised the time difference between Malaysia and Ireland is 8 hours. Blehs.

P/S: I miss you.

24th December 2009
It's Christmas Eve today. And yeah, I stayed in my room whole day again. We didn't really talk today. Not that much. She didn't come online. Oh wells, maybe she did. So I spammed at her instead through sms. I had a horror Christmas Eve. Just so you know. 2 horror movies at night. Awesome. Sounds like I'm having Halloween more than Christmas. Blehs. I really hope that I could spend my Christmas Eve with you.

P/S: I miss you.

25th December 2009
It's Christmas. Merry Christmas! Oh, I woke up late today. Like really late. Blehs. We didn't talk again today. I went to Damien Chin's party. It was, ok. I think. I feel sorry for him because I didn't go to his surprise birthday party and didn't even get him a present. Blehs. Hope you are having fun there. Don't worry, I'm having fun here. Blehs. If only you can be with me during Christmas... Anyways, Merry Christmas again! I will buy you a Christmas present and give it to you when you're back, a New Year present too. Please take care. Where's my snowman?

P/S: I miss you.

26th December 2009
We talked. I slept late but woke up early. I went to MCKL in the morning. Hmmm. I went shopping with my sister after that. She bullied me! Blehs. Everything was ok. Hope you are having fun and enjoying yourself over there.

P/S: I miss you.

27th December 2009
Hmmm. I don't think I did anything much today. I just stayed in my room the whole day again. Blehs. Oh, my eldest sister went back to Singapore. Ok, that's all for today. Please take care and have fun in Ireland.

P/S: I miss you.

28th December 2009
I went MCKL in the morning. Hmmm, blehs. I didn't go to my primary school's friend's farewell again. Nothing much for today. I just spent the rest of the day staying at home. Your sisters are so funny, just so you know. Both your sisters are. You know, some day you should let me and your sister talk for some time. I'm so looking forward to it. Hahaha! Ok, hope you are enjoying yourself over there.

P/S: I miss you.

29th December 2009
I woke up late and got scolded by dad early in the morning. I went to listen to the "amali" talk with Ming Hui. Blehs. 6 hours. So boring. Anyway, Ming Hui is funny. Nothing much for today. Remember to take care of yourself well over there.

P/S: I miss you.

30th December 2009
Breakfast at 4pm. Blehs. I just stayed in my room for today. Didn't really do anything much. I have been thinking a lot recently. Blehs. That explains why I can't fall asleep at night. Don't catch a cold since it's pretty cold in Ireland. Don't worry about anything. I'm already quite happy knowing that you had been wearing it.

P/S: I miss you.

31st December 2009
It's New Year Eve. Did nothing much. Just wish that I can spend my New Year with you tonight.

P/S: I miss you.

1st January 2010
It's New Year. Happy New Year! Didn't really do anything much. I'm glad that I could spend my New Year with you. Thanks for being with me throughout the New Year. I greatly appreciate it. Such awesome New Year I have this year. 2010~

P/S: I miss you.

2nd January 2010
Went to a cousin's who I don't even know who wedding dinner. So boring. Blehs. Remember to have fun in Ireland~

P/S: I miss you.

3rd January 2010
Blehs. So bored staying at home. Did nothing much again. Wish you were here. Well, at least we can still talk for now. My college starts tomorrow. Please take care~

P/S: I miss you.

4th January 2010
First day of college. Orientation day is so boring. Treasure Hunt is boring too. MCKL sarks. So boring and stressing. Blehs. Anyways, wish you were here. Thanks for everything last night. Help me thank your sister too. Hope you are enjoying yourself in Ireland.

P/S: I miss you.

5th January 2010
First thing in the morning. She vanished. Blehs. I shall be emo for one whole week then. Especially at night. Wish you will really enjoy your last week of stay in Ireland. I will wait for you to come back. I'm looking forward to go on a date with you.

P/S: I miss you.

6th January 2010
It's not easy to pass even a day without her around. I will feel really uneasy at night. I wonder if I can even stand it for one whole week. MCKL really sarks. The timetable sarks. So much homework when the first lesson just only started. Blehs. She's actually online. Great. Vanished huh...? Blehs.

P/S: I miss you.

7th January 2010
So much homework. Like about 100+ maths questions a day. Sarks. So stress. Blehs.

P/S: I miss you.

8th January 2010
I have nothing much to say. Homework homework homework. So stressing and boring. Blehs. Someone scolded me.

P/S: I miss you.

9th January 2010
First day of driving lesson. Hmmm. Spend rest of the day sleeping. Blehs.

P/S: I miss you.

10th January 2010
So boring. Slept whole day. Blehs. She's returning to Malaysia in one to two days time. Hmmm.

P/S: I miss you.

11th January 2010
She's coming back to Malaysia tomorrow. Wish I'm the first person she will call up when she is back. Blehs. Shouldn't expect that much. This whole week is not easy to pass. Not easy at all. Miss her so much. Wish she really had fun during her three weeks stay in Ireland. Well then. Welcome back~!

P/S: I miss you.

Zero Degree

2009-12-08T01:05:00.009+08:00

7th

Thanks for all the wishes from those who had wished me.
I'm quite amazed cause many unexpected people wished me on this very particular day.
Thanks again. =]
Thanks for the presents too.
I'm happy. =)

Squishy Monkey
Pink Shirt XD

"The stars are there cause you're so obsessed with them. *Laughs*"
=')

11th , 12th

Sleepover?
I will never regret going.
She's so nice.
=')

"Those painful memories are what can help us make it to tomorrow."

18th , 19th

Prom
Thanks, Tze Jean.
For being my prom date.
I wish that night lasts forever.
I'm still stunned.
You melted my heart.
=')

Romantic huh? XP

I'm such a lucky guy.
I'm happy.

God, please don't let me forget these days.

I love you.

De Lon

My Last Words (UPDATING)

2009-11-17T19:45:00.011+08:00

I made up my mind.

I will leave my last messages to everyone here.
SPM starts tomorrow.
All the best to everyone.
Best of luck from the great DeLon. =]
I shall write to one person each day.
Till the last day of SPM.
Find your name.
*This post will be edited from time to time. Please keep track. Thank you. =].
*Messages could be edited too.

Chia Chea

Feel proud? I hope you do. You should. I remembered you saying that you will feel proud being the first. =] So, I decided to write to you FIRST. Feel proud. Even if you don't. Even though I think this year sux, however, I would still say that it's the best year for me. The year you sat beside me. The year that I actually talked the most. Thank you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for always listening to me. Listening to all my problems. Listening to what I wanted to say. Listening to all the emo stuffs I would like to share and talk about. Although you don't seem to be interested most of the time. But still. Thank you. Sorry that I have to put you through all these. I'm just a horrible distraction after all. You can hate me. I won't blame you. How pathetic am I? The only thing that I could say to you is only thank you. And Merry Christmas. I hope and wish you don't mind. Remember that day you say that I would become a man worthy enough to make people envious? Come to think of it. What a senseless joke. Me making people envious? Funny. I'm just another worthless guy. How unlucky you are to have such a terrible guy sitting next to you everyday. Disturbing you all the time. I'm deeply sorry. For everything. Remember that you always tell me jokes hoping that they would actually make me laugh and I got lost in the end and you got depressed over it? Thank you. Really. They are funny. It's just that I don't know how to laugh. Remember that day we started playing pictionary and making everyone else playing it for the rest of the day? You, the creator of pictionary, fills my year with everything. The year that I try to learn to become awesome, sweet and romantic. Sorry to disappoint you. I failed you. Awesome and sweet don't suit me at all. I'm just a cold and horrible person. I might still have things to write to you but I forgot. That's all for now. Forgive me. For everything. Will you? All the best from the bottom of my heart. In everything. Really. Hope that you have met your dream guy. Remember that I know about your dream guy and you know about my dream girl? It was really nice. Thank you again and sorry for everything. I'm happy to meet you in my last year in WMS. Good luck.

Then I see you standing there
Wanting more from me
And all I can do is try
Then I see you standing there
I'm all I'll ever be
But all I can do is try

Emelia

The sweetest lady I have ever met till now. I can't really think of anything to say to you. I'm at a loss of words. You always make my days. Brighten them up. Even when I got swallowed in darkness, you showed me the way to the door of light. How am I supposed to thank you? How am I? I don't know. I really don't know. Sweetheart. Forgive me. Forgive me. Forgive me. I really don't know what can I do to appreciate what you have given me. I'm pathetic. Begging for forgiveness here. Please. Promise me. Smile always. Please. Or Yi Von will beat me. The saltwater room. Owl city. On a lonely night. Thank you. "Rely on others to make you happy." I will never forget you quoting that. Remember you asked me to teach you to play DOTA. I hereby promise you with my heart. I will. I will. I will. Remember the first thing you said about me is I'm cute? I'm still wondering how cute am I. You have made me smile. You have made me laugh. You almost made me cry once. You have been listening to me. I greatly appreciate it. Really. Although you always suddenly went off without me knowing. But thank you. Really. Thank you for everything. Sorry if I have put you through hard times. All the best from the bottom of my heart. In everything. Thank you and sorry for everything, sweetheart. Good luck in life. I miss playing hide and seek. =P

Give me more loving from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things you never even tell your closest friends
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
You’re the best that I’ve had
And I’m so glad I found you

One Heart, One Man

2009-11-09T15:38:00.015+08:00

I wanna blog.
But I'm not so sure what to blog about.
I feel so unwell.
Feel like vomiting.
Perhaps I'm sick.
Blehs.
This is not the priceless post. It's postponed.

I want you to know

It doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone

Create the road of talent.

There are always ways to survive if you can go beyond the ordinary.

The route you take depends on how far you can go.

When someone loses one of their five senses, in order to make up for the lost sense, the other four senses will improve beyond the ordinary.

If that's the case, set a limiter in ourselves so that we have a chance to gain something.

People whose one skill is extremely high, they have to sacrifice another skill as payment.

It’s like a tree.

When one branch is broken, the others around it grow out and cover the hole, filling in for what’s missing.

In a RPG game, if a character is lacking in one skill, there wouldn’t be any problem as long as the other skill is strengthen greatly to compensate for it.

Shotgun or Sniper

If I am to choose, I will choose sniper.
Be accurate.
Be more observant.

I hope all these can encourage everyone to do better in the coming exam, SPM.
Good luck, people.
All the best. =]

When I see your smile
Tears roll down my face
I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul,
And I know I'll find deep inside me, I can be the one

Rely on others to make you happy.

Emelia

That was really sweet.
So long already but I still can remember till now.
Thank you.
Don't worry.
I won't forget you.
So you can't kill me.
And also.
I will go.
Let's play hide and seek again, ok? =D
All the best in everything. =)

Seasons are changing and waves are crashing

And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you, I'll be the one

Whatever you do, the question will always be the same.
Why don't you talk to her?

Jon Yap

I don't know why.
I can't start a conversation with her.
I...
I...
I...
I...
I...
See.

I just can't.

Screw this.

"When one sees weakness, one knows strength."

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray
It's okay

Let's live a colourful life.

为什么我每一次都是这样?
很后悔
好辛苦
好难受
对不起
都怪我没用
I walked away without looking back.

Cause I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay

I will still continue to smile. =)

Say what you will.
But give me a break.
Call me insane.
Call me unexpected.
Call me nuts.
Call me unfaithful.
But I'm only one man, with one heart.
I can't be insane all the time.
I can't like more than one person at a time.

Cause you're
My true love
My whole heart
Please don't throw that away

Dream or Reality

I want both.
A dream then turn it into reality.
That would be the best.

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all,
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

I have a dream.
I want everyone to come to my studio and take pictures of our last moment together.
Pictures are the best gifts that I can give to everyone.
Words, memories, everything.
I grow up in a studio.
I have seen photo taking more than anyone else.
Come to think of it.
Who wanna go to a studio just to take pictures?
Nonsense.

DeLon

Jia Huei =)

2009-11-03T23:41:00.008+08:00

Read until the end of this post.
To find out about the title.

Perfect title huh? =P

I feel like crying!
Don't cry! I don't have tissues with me now.
I don't have either!
Oh, you can use my handkerchief. =]

Chia Chea
Me

有时候有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽

Look at your face also know that your mind is full of love stress and exam stress.
That's why you are eating salt.
*Continue eating salt.

Boon Khim

I have a lot to post.
But I can't remember.
My apologies.
Too stressed.

I close my eyes
And the flashback starts
I'm standing there
On a balcony in summer air

Happy Belated Halloween!

&

Happy Belated Birthday, Tze Jean!

Please forgive me for my late post.
Hope you had a really awesome birthday.
You know.
I really don't expect anything from you by planning up all these surprises.
Well, maybe a direct thank you from you.
I only have one intention.
To make you smile.
To make you happy.
That's all.
Nothing else.
And now my task is complete.
Don't think about anything.
No answers, nothing.
Just be happy and smile.
That's the best thing you can give me back in return.

Because I am the wizard of ooh's and ah's and fa-la-la's.

I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you but you never come
Is this in my head? I don't know what to think

Thank You

Jia Huei & Jo
Thank you for assisting me in organizing the surprise party.
The surprise party wouldn't have succeed without you girls.
Thanks for all the help.

Ki Yip
Thank you.
Ideas, time, credits, efforts and of course, the locker key.
Remember the 2 days we reached school at 6 something in the morning just to prepare everything.
Remember that day you ran under the rain with me just to buy a rose.
I greatly appreciate everything you have done for me.
Really.
Thanks for everything.

Chou Yun
Thank you.
For lending me 50 bucks and helping me to buy stuffs.
Although I didn't use the money in the end.
But still.
Thanks for everything.

Ming Hui
Thank you.
For lending me 10 bucks although I didn't use it in the end either.
But still thanks for everything.

Kai Jie
Well, I don't really remember what you have helped me out.
Sorry about that.
But still thanks for everything.
Oh ya, the blogskin. =P

Jon Yap
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
You came over my house and stayed overnight.
Just to help me prepare everything.
The presents, the cake, everything.
Choosing and wrapping all the stuffs for me.
Everything wouldn't have turned out well without you.
Thanks for everything. =)

Thanks to everyone who has supported me in all these.
Giving me strength and courage.
Being secret keepers.
Thanks lots.

I opened my eyes last night and saw you in the low light
Walking down by the bay, on the shore, staring up at the planes that aren’t there anymore
I was feeling the night grow old and you were looking so cold

Comments Comments Comments

People asked me where do I get the ideas from.
Well, actually.
Most of the ideas just flow into my mind all of sudden.
I didn't really go and think about them.
They are always with me.

People salute me for my courage.
How hilarious.
Since I have already thought of the ideas, I might as well work them out.
So that I won't regret in the future.
But still I know I sux.
Blehs.
Thanks anyway.

People are teasing me saying that I have a girlfriend now.
How hilarious.
Ok, seriously.
I'm still single.
Just so you know.
So people should stop making assumptions.
I didn't even plan to confess yet in the first place.

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time

Cause I like you. I hate the fact I really do.

What a weekend.

And I thought I can finally feel relieved.
Can finally wrap up all those disturbing feelings and concentrate on studies.
But it turns out that I can't.
Things still stay in my mind.
Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

Actually, I really hate being sweet.
Really.
Sorry about this, sweetheart. =(
Hate the fact that I know all these stuffs.
They just annoy me.
I would rather be cold.

I always like being alone.
Walking home alone from school.
I want to be alone.
But I hate loneliness.
How hilarious.

I always sit in front of the computer.
Doing nothing.
Just listening to music.
Thinking deeply.
How lifeless.
I like how some music flows.

Remember that day I went Wilson's house planning to group study.
Really thought that I can really put down everything and focus.
But ended up lying on the bed thinking of all the disturbing stuffs.
And Wilson sitting in front of his computer doing his own stuffs.
But then going Mcd at 1am in the midnight.
Speeding on the road.
Fun.

When we're apart, whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Smile for the last time in school.

Perhaps I'm the one thinking too much.
I really have a lot, a lot to blog.
But my mind is just too disturbed.
I can't remember what to say.
I really hope this post can wrap up all my feelings.
Let me study, please.
I promise a priceless post soon.
I'm really tired.
Of everything.

And so as promise. =P

Hi, Jia Huei. I wanna blog but I can't think of a title.
You can put my name. =)
Are you serious? I have thought of that too, actually.
Yeah put my name. Perfect title. XD

Jia Huei
Me

Welcome to the funny emo blog of mine! =)

2009-10-20T23:31:00.013+08:00

Your blog is dying.
Mine is happy and alive.
Yours is emo and dying.
Why is everyone saying mine is emo just because the background is black in colour?
It's not because it's black.
It's because it's black and red.
Deadly.

Jia Huei
Me

Are you feeling proud now?
You should.
I started my post with you. =)
She said jamin's blog is happy but dead.
But it will resurrect. XD
I'm sorry but I eventually forgot what to say about you.
Next post, ok? XD

Pei Shen said my reindeer is cute.
The previous Chopper.
How sweet. =D

So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold
Speak to me

Complicated.
So what?
I like. =]

"The most precise machines require elaborate maintenance and complicated systems."

I shall go.
After SPM.
Singapore.
I'm coming soon. =D

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no

To tell the truth.
I actually have another reason for skipping school.
No one should ever know this particular reason. D=

Copyright.
Saving pictures from no where.
Isn't it actually a crime?
Perhaps I should start taking my own interesting pictures and post them up.
Better than I'm copyrighting. >.>"

By the way, why are people calling me small boy? >.<"
Especially my kai jie.
Bullies me so much. >.<"
Is it just because my birthday falls on the December?
Or there are other reasons too?
I wonder. D=

怎么冷酷却仍然美丽
得不到的从来矜贵
身处劣势如何不攻心计
流露敬畏试探你的法规

There's this really unpleasant issue going around.
Screw those mean people, seriously. _l_

Just so you know.
I don't mind. At all. =]
And I will become awesome as promise.

I know you can't.
It's okay.
Since you started the conversation.
I'm already happy enough.
Just so you know. =)

I’ve tried to go on like I never knew you
I’m awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete

Can improve.
=)

Chia Chea
Me

Am I chivalrous?

Does Italian always give sweet talk?
Not sweet.
Romantic.
Then I am Italian. X)

Chia Chea
Me

You're sweet.
But not romantic.
I am both.
I just don't show them.
Why not?
Doesn't feel like it yet.
I will, when time comes. =)

Everytime you tell me things like this, I don't mind listening but it's way too complicated for me to say anything.

My god. I really hope you don't die.

I won't die that easily. XD
Thank you for listening to me all the time.
Well, not all the time but most.
Although you always seem uninterested.
Thank you again and sorry that I have put you through all these all this while. =)

Talking to you is actually quite fun and entertaining.
I might as well go school just to talk to you.
We only have few days left by the way. =(
You're really funny and sweet. =]
Oh, before I forgot.
You afraid that I may embarass you here.
Don't worry, I won't. =P
You're too sweet for me to do so. =)
I wanna talk about you more.
But eventually I forgot what to talk about you again.
Next post. =]

Hey, let me show you something special and funny.

I haven't shown it to much people yet.
Ok.
(Drew something on her hand and fingers.)
This is spider.
Hi spider.
But it's a crab.
Yer. Why does everyone say it looks like a crab?
It's a spider.
But it really looks like a crab.
Then how can I make it look more like a spider?
I don't know. *Laughs
(Then she wrote the word "spider" just below the drawing of the spider on her hand.)
XD *Hilarious

Chia Chea
Me

Promise I'll be kind
But I won't stop until that girl is mine
Baby, you'll be famous, chase you down until you love me
Papa, paparazzi

We created a study group again and went to Wei Yuen's house this time on last thursday.
What's with the Leisure Mall, cybercafe and mahjong? =.="
It was still fun anyway.
Cybercafe at midnight.
But his brother's room is really gross. >.<"

There's this person who always wakes up at 4am everyday just to watch telly.
And that actually influences me to sleep at 4am everyday.
After studying of course.
And then sleeps in school in the next day.
That was admirable. =]

I wanted to type some hidden texts here.
But it seems that everyone notices them.
So there's no point hiding them anymore.
I might as well create a new private blog for myself and type them there. =.="
They are supposed to be hidden.

I think I'm really emotionally disturbed these few weeks.
Don't ask me why.
I don't know why either.
I'm just distracted.
Perhaps I should just go back to my gaming life. =/
That would be pretty much too lifeless.

爱是一道光
如此美妙
指引我们
想要的未来
魔力北极光
奇幻的预言
赶快去找不思议的爱

Don't worry.
As long as.
Everyone is.
She is.
I will still be.
Happy. =)

DeLon

Requiem For A Dream

2009-10-12T15:55:00.019+08:00

I'm a Chingstah.

"I don't hang with the G's, I just roll with the C's."

What's a chingstah? :-O
Asian gangster.
=.=" Chin = Chinese???
I don't know. XD

Sue Ann
Me

Hey greedy, don’t fret
What you see is what you get
You name it, I have it
What you see is what you get

I just broke a promise.
I'm supposed to update last week.
My apologies.
I'm updating now.
I hope this is long enough.
Enjoy~ =]

Hey, Chia Chea. Don't get so depressed.
Look at the square tree outside the window and smile. =)
But it isn't square anymore!
Zzz... =.="

Chia Chea
Me

There's always something
In the way
There's always something
Getting through
But it's not me
It's you

Before I continue.
Jia Huei. There's something really important I need you to help me out.
Pretty pretty please with a cherry on top.
I have a feeling that I can't make it without you.
You must help me out.
Since you are my vice. =]

Does a parallel world really exist?

All I ever wanted
Was to see you smiling
All I ever wanted
Was to make you mine
I know that I love you
Oh baby why don't you see
That's all I ever wanted
Was you and me

"There ain't nothing more important than promises."

It's a promise.

Never walk away from me again. =]

"Forget all your pain and misery, just feel the serene and tranquil surrounding."

Open your eyes
And look outside
Find the reasons why

At a second thought.
I chose to give up.
I'm always strayed from the path.
Xe Haw knows what I'm talking about.

我不配

I didn't know there's someone so much more complicated than me.
Now you know.

Chia Chea
Me

To tell the truth.
She's the most complicated girl I have ever met.
I hope I am simple-minded too.

It starts with
All I know
It's so unreal
Watch you go

Why do you care so much about other people?

I wanted to answer this question here.
But come to think of it.
This question has the similar answer to the other question.
So I will only give you the answers when time comes. =]

Your wonderful smile is the best present.
Your smile gives me strength.

I will become awesome.
It's a promise.
Although I don't know how.
But I will. =]
So that YOUR sister and MY sister won't hit me. >.<"

An invisible thread of fate?
Those words haunt me.

I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall to lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter

*** * **** ***...
Oh crap. Just take it as I didn't say anything.
But it's so sweet.

Chia Chea
Me

Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]
Thank you. =]

"Friendship across mankind is like pureness and elegance of the twinkle little stars in the sky."

Colours
It reminds me of my English essay I wrote in the trial exam.
The marks are surprisingly unexpected.
I thought I screwed up some more.
It was really surprising. =D

She got her own thing
That's why I love her
Miss Independent
Ooh the way we shine

Staring at stars it's just like floating among the stars.

Star Memory
It's a sacred place.
A natural phenomenon made by the planet's life-force over billions of years.
Legend has it that somewhere on this planet there's a place that holds all the questions in the world, and all the answers.
Humans are so small, so insignificant.
Our memories are just a drop of water in that sea of memory.
And we can't even remember everything in our own short lives.
We do our best to remember the good times, try to forget the bad.

It's a world that transcends space and time.
The star's life is an accumulation of many times and spaces gathered together.
It's where you can manipulate space and time.

Stars possess a light of hope.

On the other day, I read about this really amazing operation in a medical book.
I'm not a doctor. I just read medical books and gained some medical knowledge.
I didn't make up this story. It's a true operation.
There's this kid who is a really good baseball player has a tumour in his thumb.
At first, the only way to cure it is by chopping off his thumb which will destroy his dream.
A doctor who is his fan finally thinks of a way to cure his thumb without chopping it off.

Regeneration

Chopping off a finger is just the simplest way to kill all the cancerous cells in the finger and stop the cancerous cells from spreading.
However, removing all the cancerous cells from the thumb can actually cure the finger.
Of course, it will be a really risky operation.
The operation must be successful and done by a very skillful surgeon so that all cancerous cells are completely removed from the finger so that it won't spread any further.
After that, plant the finger inside the liver so that it can regenerate rapidly to avoid bacteria's infection.
If the cancerous cells are not removed completely, it will spread to the liver and eventually infect the liver.
Therefore, the operation must be a success.
Amazing, isn't it?
Such awesome operation, it has been proven.
No one should be fingerless anymore.
Really. It's curable.
Just have to risk it.
It worths it.
Believe it or not, your wish.
If I were him, I will choose to risk too.
Without a thumb, I can't hold a thing.
Believe in our inner vitality.
Doctors are the ones who should create miracles.
Patients can only believe in them and pray.
This is why I'm interested in medicine.
Fate is cruel.
Doctors are born to fight it.

That strength that we have
It's not power
It's our will to believe
Our will to imagine
Our will to love
Our true strength lies in our hearts

Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

I wasted my last holidays.
I didn't study at all.
I'm kinda regret now.

"Only someone with a kind heart who can understand another's pain can achieve true strength."

I sleep at 4a.m. everyday.
I'm pretty exhausted.
I wonder how long more I can actually stand.

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?

Hey. You confirm going prom with her or not one?
I don't know. I think so. *Laughs

"Trust is another part of courage."

I hope jealousy doesn't exist.
My life would have been a lot better than now.

I suddenly feel like ranting.
So I'm going to start ranting about stuffs.
Please look forward to them and don't forget to read and rate them. =]

I'm currently quite motivated to study due to my exam's results.
Study study study!

I created a study group last friday.
It turned out quite well.
My presence can actually make people study. =D
It was fun.
Except the part which there were tissues in my coffee. _l_

It's ridiculous
It's been months
And for some reason I just
Can't get over us
And I'm stronger than this, yeah

Hey everyone.
This is chopper.
It's a reindeer, not a stalker bear.
It's cute, isn't it?
It's birthday falls on the Christmas Eve. =]

See your panda look...
Sure much cuter than the thingy there <.< (Chopper)
Lol. It's already so cute...
How can I be cuter than it?!
LOL
THAT THINGY CUTE??!!
Hahaha! XD
Yalah.
Err the eyes got no pupil also... :-O
SCARY!!!
LOL

Sue Ann
Me

I just got a kai jie. =D
She bullies me a lot. XP

Enough is enough
No more walking around
With my head down
Yeah
I'm so over being blue
Crying over you

Wasn't there ever a time you were happy?
Lol I don't know... =/

Emelia
Me

Your thoughts are funny.
=.=
Sorry lah.
It's 2 am.
Of course I say funny stuffs.
LOL
If that's the case I will talk to you at 2 am next time then. =D

Hilarious.
Gay and lesbian.
And the webcam with the poking tongue.
Thank you.
You made my day. =]

I'm so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory

And how every song reminds me
Of what used to be

Just what's wrong with me these days?
I dunno. I dunno. I dunno.
I'm emotionally disturbed. >.<

Ok. I think this is long enough.
I think this is the longest post I have ever posted.
I should stop here.
It seems that I have a lot more to blog about but I can't remember them.
I'm sorry if I left out anything.
I will post them up in the next post if I remember.
I have been blogging for hours.
I'm tired.
I skipped school today again just to blog.
Take care.
I'm still happy. =)

Life is like a journey
To journey is to live

DeLon

Please be patient. TQ. =]

2009-10-05T22:04:00.004+08:00

I'm sorry for being missing for weeks.

I promise a long post by this week. =]
___________________________________________

Exams' Results

To tell the truth, I'm actually quite satisfied.
The marks are so surprisingly unexpected.
Not to say high.
But unexpected.
Although I still screwed up some.
Sigh.

The Place Where The Star Fell =)

2009-09-21T12:58:00.005+08:00

It's pretty, isn't it?
I love stars. =)
They remind me of something precious.
I always wonder what do stars represent in our life?
Memories? =/
I wonder.
Can any kind soul tell me please? =]

I won't fall down. =)

2009-09-14T01:19:00.003+08:00

Splat! XD
I'm sorry about the picture.
I failed my art. XD
____________________________________________

4 more days to go.
Good luck to everyone.
Take care. =)

Time To Pawn

2009-09-09T00:36:00.006+08:00

"Use no way as a way, use no limitation as a limitation."

There's always a time when even the laziest people on Earth will stand up and fight.
It's SPM trials.
Good luck to everyone.
Take care. =)

Sorry people, blame my A.D.D..

2009-09-02T01:36:00.007+08:00

Before you read this post, I would kindly advise you not to read it because ...

WARNING

The following post makes almost no sense at all.
It is pointless and I don't know why I typed it.
Viewer discretion is advised.

"You'll never leave where you are until you decide where you'd rather be."

Recently, I have been really negative.
I'm negative-minded.
Small things could make me really emo.
I don't want to be emo.
I don't want to be negative.
Wait.
I'm always negative.

"If you love something let it go,
If it comes back to you it's yours,
If it doesn't, it never was."

SAW XII

Critics rate.
6 times better than SAW II.
3 times better than SAW IV.
Almost as good as a SEESAW.
2.4 times better than SAW V.

"You want a candy?"
"Okay, sure!"

Coming in 2060.

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."

You know.
People have been making assumptions about me.
In school, in tuition and even in my own house.
De Lon, you are scary.

Look! I cut my own hair!
Okay, do I look scary?
He's so cute~
Hahaha!
Just kidding. XD
But seriously.
Back to topic.
If I look scary,
You better look at yourself in a HA-HA mirror. XP
No offence or referring to anyone.

"A friend will walk many miles,
To share your tears,
To give you smiles,
And even though paths may drift apart,
A true friend never leaves the heart."

I skipped school again.
It's not that I am lazy.
It's just because of my A.D.D..
Sorry to everyone.
I would rather choose to finish studying than feeling guilty for skipping school.
Even the laziest person on Earth who is me will become serious on studies.
Time to activate my study mood.
Exam soon.
I may look freaking scary now.
Seriously.
Somehow.
I have enough of this life.
End it.
I have no regrets.

"Life is too short to be anything but happy."

Everything is ending...

2009-08-20T00:34:00.004+08:00

Stranger @ Lover
That was hilarious.
You brightened up my night.
Although it was still dark.
Thank you.

Trying to tell myself she's not ignoring me again. What a pain...

我想了十几个夜晚
我想我一直都在想
什么是完美的感动
我想到开始头痛

Imagine you and your friends are sitting at a table with 15 bowls of soups.
That was pretty funny.
We only ordered soups.
Nothing else.
I think we are kinda bad customers.
Anyway, I will upload a picture of the soups' bowls soon.

你说不定也是一样
想要爱却害怕遗憾
你说不定也很希望
我可以比你勇敢

I have used before almost all types of Gatsby Moving Rubber.

Except for gray.
I'm currently using orange. =)
Blue sucks.
Gray, I'm coming for you next!

躺在星空下的草地上
心事全都摊开让你看
满天星星张大眼睛盯著我

Please.
Stop the homework madness.
I can't take it anymore.
I'm pretty exhausted.
And.
I felt useless and helpless again.
I'm sorry.
Blehs.

想要说
任他们说他们看我都不管
我只要宣布爱你的人就是我
对没有错就是要
简简单单就是我爱你爱我
不需要啰嗦

I had the last meeting for library prefects this week.
Finally.
I'm free!

你说不定也是一样
想要爱却害怕遗憾
你说不定也很希望
能和我交个朋友

"It's so sad. It's so sad."
She almost cried.

To be continue...

Giving Each Other A Chance =)

2009-08-15T23:14:00.006+08:00

期待期待你发现我的爱
无所不在我自然而然的关怀
你的存在心灵感应的方向
我一眼就看出来
是因为爱

Interact's Farewell

Thank you for everything.
You guys are awesome.
The candles are pretty funny.

喔亲爱的别难过
只要紧紧握着我的手
撑着悲伤不回头
却感觉此刻你停不了的泪流
唯有爱才能永垂不朽
唯有你我才能找回我

She said I looked scary.
She asked me if I was ok.
She said she doesn't like the emo De Lon.
She asked me why am I so emo.
She called me Mr. Emo.
They called me Emo King.
Blehs.

Black Black Heart
Send 给你我的心
计划是分开旅行啊
为何像结局
我明白停在你的怀里
却不一定在你心里

I had a really wonderful dream.
A really wonderful dream.
Hope that I will never wake up from that dream.
I dreamt about her and me.

我不想要去证明也不知道怎么证明
相爱是两人事情我不喜欢你怀疑
怀疑爱是可怕的武器谋杀了爱情

I don't want those who are important to me get hurt anymore.

I'm sorry if I said the something wrong again.
Everyone has a reason behind them.
Truths or lies.
I felt guilty too.

我知道你還放不下我
才會在離開時
閉著眼沒有回頭

I thought I'm not gonna regret anymore.
It happened again.
And again.
Sigh.

笑着难过自我惩罚
想终止这一切挣扎
狠了心说真心谎话
别告诉她我还想她
恨总比爱容易放下
当泪水堵住了胸口
就让沉默代替所有回答

I skipped school for two days.
Meaninglessly.
I told my parents that I will study at home.
But I slept for about 12 hours everyday.
I'm sorry.
Guess I was really tired.
I'm sorry Chia Chea if you felt lonely these two days.

想出我的孤單
More And More 既是深刻
愛亮了
愛笑了
I'm Always Online

I waited for her everyday.
I guess I'm adoring her.

我猜你早已发现我的爱
绕几个弯越靠近越明白
不要走开
幸福的开始就是放手去爱

Ignore this post.

2009-08-09T08:31:00.004+08:00

Seriously, ignore this post if possible.
I would rather no one read this.

Ever stuck in a situation
Where two people are afraid of each other
For some unknown reasons
Trying to talk back to each other
Now I understand how hard it is to fix a relationship
It's so hard to even talk to each other again
It seems like there's a barrier between us
Normally we won't turn speechless
Never
But now we do
At the beginning of the conversation some more
How depressing
I'm sorry
I really don't know what to talk about anymore
Perhaps a smile could make the conversation goes on
But it will end
Soon or later
Well
At least I'm trying my best to say something
Not to mention that her replies are pretty cold
Really
It's very hard to give responds
Being so cold like that
It's so hard to figure out what to type next
Sigh
That's how hard for us to talk to each other now
I guess we will not even say 'Hi' to each other
When we pass by each other
What a pain
What an excuse
I'm a pessimist too
I'm always negative
At least I don't train to be like that
I'm just born like that
Fine
I would rather not to give my opinion on this
Cause it would be very disappointing
I don't wanna be a pessimist anyway
I'm always waiting
Wherever I am
Unaware of loss
Nor aware of gain
I always sit in front of my computer
Waiting for her to come online and talk to me
I can't talk to her
Cause I never know if she's there
Everyday spending my time waiting
I'm supposed to be studying
But I admit that I can't multitask
Once I sit in front of my computer
I will just wait and stone
How great
And I have been liked that for three weeks
If things end up disappointing
I will just go to sleep
I need to study
Seriously
I don't even know why am I waiting
Maybe I just miss her
I can't sms her
I will be wasting her credits
And then I will feel guilty
What a hard life
Stuck in the middle of no where
Thanks for being that cold
And one day I may eventually stop talking to her
Just stare at her
And wait for her
How would you feel
When you are talking to a person
And that person goes off in the middle of the conversation
To watch a movie
And then come back to tell you what she did
Isn't that disappointing
Heart-breaking
Making you feel that you are so unimportant
It's my own fault for not being responsive by the way
I don't blame her
I never do
I blame myself
Girls are pretty complicated
And difficult
I am too
The world would be a better place
If everyone can view anything at two different angles
I used to be able to
I can't anymore
I don't know why
I just cant figure out what are they thinking anymore
Blehs
There will always be times
When people can't keep things to themselves anymore
I used to keep things to myself
Trying to say everything will be fine to myself
And now
I'm telling my blog
And people too
I can't keep them with myself anymore
It is always better to share
Just a little bit
Could make you feel a lot better
After typing these things out
I wonder why am I thinking like that
It's not like she will care anyway
I'm just stressing myself up
I need to stop
I really need to start studying
Why is this happening at a time like this
Am I adoring her
I hope not
I'm not supposed to anyway
It seems like things are still unsettled
I still have thousands of things flowing through my mind
It will take forever to type out my thoughts on her
The endless thoughts
Thanks for putting in a situation like this
I really got no idea what to do
Sigh
I should stop typing
However
I will always be waiting
Waiting for one's arrival
I have no regrets
This is my only path

沒有如果

2009-08-08T00:38:00.004+08:00

委屈時候沒有你
陪著我心痛
一切都是我
太過驕縱
以為你會懂
一直忘了說
我有多感動

I freaking hate teachers.
Seriously.

雖然分開的理由
我們都已接受
在腦海裡頭
我多希望你
還在我左右
你知道我會有多難過

Now.
I finally understand how hard it is to fix a relationship.

I'm sorry for everything.
The truth is...
I am afraid, too.

有人說
世界上最遙遠的距離不是生與死
而是我就站在你面前
還想什麼還怕什麼
別怕太快樂　別怕失去我

Hope.
It's all I need now.
Give me, will you?

錯過就過你是不是會難過
若如果拿來當藉口
那愛是不是有一點弱

I want to be remembered
As the one who smiles
Even though his heart is broken
And the one who can always
Brighten up your day even if he
Couldn't brighten up his own

I miss you.

2009-08-05T23:46:00.006+08:00

There were no sounds of insects in the garden as it was silent.
In the bright night, I remember only my eyes being hot.
I did not cry out nor did I feel sad.
But I could not stop my tears until the moon sunk.

I miss you.
I miss you much.
I miss you lots.

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is You

Pool online is fun.
At least it's entertaining.

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

If you cry, I'll cry too.

I am always emo all day.
But I am happy.
Words like these make me happy.
I will learn to smile. =)

I'm sorry that I hurt you
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears

Such meaningless school days.
I don't feel like going to school anymore.

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?

Tell me that's not the something you wanted to tell.

I wonder if she knows how I feel.
Walking away seems to be better after all.
Such miserable life.
Don't feel like living anymore~

Cause I need time
My heart is numb and has no feeling
So while I'm still healing
Just try and have a little patience

There's this particular thing that bothers me everyday for now.
Beside studies.
So I'm sorry if the recent posts are almost the same.

Cause this scar runs so deep
It has been hard
But you have to believe me
Have a little patience

I thought I don't wanna regret anymore.
Fine, forget it.
Not gonna regret anymore.

I'll try to be strong
Believe me
I'm trying to move on
It's complicated but understand me

So clever, Whatever
I'm done with these endeavors

Alone, I will walk the winding way

It's over
No longer I feel it growing stronger
I live to die
Another way until I fade away

That was just so cold...

2009-08-01T10:24:00.005+08:00

I'm so alone

Here on my own
And I'm waiting for you to come

Do girls love to lie?
At a certain degree, yes. I think they like to lie.

没答案没答案真爱在哪
我的爱我的爱难道是他
用力想用力想没有回答
百分百恋爱会是理想

Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.

Please tell me that my announcement was not funny.
It was not supposed to be funny anyway.
So stop mocking me.
That was a great experience anyway.

Is this the way it's meant to be?
Only dreaming that you're missing me
I'm waiting here at home
I'll be crazy now you're gone

Can you people quit complaining and go study?

There's an empty place in my heart
Without you it will break apart
It won't heal, it never fades away
I'll be thinking about you everyday

Thank you for saying that I'm nice.
Sorry if I am not that funny and amusing anymore.

All I ever wanted
Was to see you smiling

If loneliness is like being 'cold', then I understand how it feels.

I went to PC fair with Felix.
I just wanted to have a walk with a friend.
That was relaxing.
Thank you.
P.S. The models are freaking hot.

想跟我吵架我没那么无聊
不懂得道歉我没那么聪明
好想要回到我们的原点

I had something to blog.

But I forgot.

I want to be
A part of you
Think of all the things we could do
And everyday, you're in my head

I don't know what to say.
I don't know what to do.

Everything doesn't matter anymore.
Sometimes human beings should learn to give up.

My body is made of swords.
Iron is my blood, and glass is my heart.
I have overcome countless battlefields undefeated,
Without once retreating,
Nor once being understood.
Always alone, intoxicated with victory on the hill of swords.
Therefore, there is no meaning to that life.
Perhaps this body is nothing but a sword itself.

I'm speechless...

2009-07-26T00:11:00.001+08:00

I don't know what to say.
I don't want to say anything anymore.
Am I being too sensitive?
All that I can think of and feel now is only pain.
The endless pain.

It's endless.
For a moment, I feel like stabbing myself using that blade.
Like what he did.
It will be better that way.
Cause doing so can silence my heart's pain.
And I may feel better that way.
Now I understand why do people suicide.
Dying is always the better choice.
Cause after we died,
There will be no worry.
There will be no pain.

不要对我再说爱
我坦白一直忘不了原来
不要对我再说爱
我害怕我们再受到伤害

I just can't figure it out.
Tell me why.
I just can't seem to face the truth.

That was so unreasonable.
Ignoring me like that.
I chose to wait.
But now I'm walking away.
Walk away.

If there's trust, it will show.
If there's love, it will grow.
If we rush, we'll never know.
You have to let it flow.

It's time for you to return.

I didn't know it will be that soon.
But I would like to fade away this time.
Goodbye and welcome back, De Lon.

However, I will still be waiting.
I will still wait.
Until you feel like talking to me again.
You melted and freezed my heart.
Now I want to freeze time.
So that I can stop getting hurt instead of being healed.
I'm walking away.
I shall be gone.
Farewell, cruel world.
You won't miss me, will you?

The Frustrated De Lon

Untitled

2009-07-22T22:41:00.007+08:00

街道　我徘徊

燈　亮起來
冰冷冷的霧氣
風　吹不散

看著　你離開
心　有點亂
該熱鬧的時候
你卻不在

等著　你醒來
天　有些暗
站在這裡只為了
你回來

一個人能說出怎麼樣的對白
空房間只剩我的無奈
花謝了
花又開
你卻不再回來
靜靜的試著
忘了愛

I pace back and forth along the street
The lamp lights up
The wind can't seem to dispel
The ice-cold mist

I watch as you leave
My heart is in turmoil
When things should be lively
You are actually not here

I'm waiting for you to wake up
The sky is a little dark
I'm standing here only to wait for
You to come back

What kind of conversation can one person hold
All that's left in this empty room is my helplessness
The flowers have withered
And bloomed again
And yet you will never return again
I am silently trying to
Forget love

What a week.
Seriously.
What a week.
Everything is at its worst case scenario.
DeJa Vu

I'm so-so-so sorry
I'm so-so-so sorry
I didn't mean to break your heart
I didn't mean to break your heart

Life is funny, sometimes.

You know that he won't call you like he said he will.
Yet you still wait.
Hoping that he will actually call.

You know that he won't appreciate your little gift.
Yet you still buy him a gift.
Hoping that he will actually appreciate it.

You know that she won't sit next to you.
Yet you still sit there and wait.
Hoping that she will actually come and sit with you.

You know that the exam is coming.
Yet you are still not studying.
Hoping that you can actually get a good result.

You know that it's not a good thing to say or do.
Yet you still say or do it.
Hoping that you can actually seek attention by saying or doing it.

You know that she's ignoring you.
Yet you still wait.
Hoping that she will actually talk to you again.

Is it because of the existence of hope
That we are still believing in tomorrow?

Tell me why
I can't seem to face the truth

But you give me one good reason
To fight and never walk away

Why?
Why are people ignoring me?
Don't hate me.
And I'm not invisible.
What did I do wrong?
Just what did I do wrong?
I try my best but I just can't take it anymore.
Tell me why.
Give me a reason.
Please.
At least let me know why.
Don't leave me there like that.
It's heart-breaking.

Create a memory and visit it often.

I will learn and change.
If I really did make a big mistake.
I'm sorry.
For everything.
I didn't mean to be mad at you.

這麼冷的冬天
我走在一個人的街上
　　　　天空飄下了雪
而我想起了你
就在這個時候
眼淚流下來

To tell the truth.
The best moment of my daily life is when I'm talking to you.
I really do appreciate that.
But now.
The best moment is gone.
Like that.
Without a reason.
I just want to tell you.
I miss you so much.

De Lon

Give me... Hope.

2009-07-18T21:00:00.009+08:00

Just like crabs.
Hard exterior.
Soft interior.

Look at the pool's balls.
They are so shiny that they are reflecting each other!
Playing pool for hours was fun.
I will miss that moment.
When everyone is having fun.
But being 'toma' is not that fun.
Playing handicap was stupid but fun!
Imagine everyone carrying bag playing pool. XD
I shall miss that cute and fun moment.
I like and miss playing pool. =)

I don't wish to be something to everyone.
But I wish to be something to someone.

I'm sorry.
About that night.
Come to think of it.
Everyone is performing the last concert of the year at school.
Puteri Gunung Ledang
And I'm blogging at home.
How great.
Hope everyone enjoyed their last concert.

Pain reaches the heart with electrical speed.
But truth moves to the heart as slowly as a glacier.
I just want to know the truths of everything.

Farewell is supposed to be left unsaid.
But still.
Farewell, Damien Chin.
Have a safe trip back to NZ.

The Undescribable De Lon

The world is full of stories, but the stories are all one.

2009-07-17T00:35:00.009+08:00

I lost myself.
I can't bear the pain anymore.
I can't keep them within myself anymore.
I need to tell others.
My stories.

Fairness does not govern life and death.

Things just didn't work out as I thought it would.
It was not supposed to be a bad day.
Now, it was.
I wanted to tell my stories that night.
I wanted to know what can still be done.
I need advices.
I need help.
I need someone to listen to me.
To my stories.
I don't wanna repeat the same mistakes again and again.
The last will be the last.
I don't wanna regret anymore.
But it happened again.
Why?
Why?
I wanted to tell you.
But I guessed I have to tell my blog again.

Strangers are just family you have yet to come to know.

Don't hate me.
Don't ignore me.
I know everything was my fault.
You can blame me for not loving her.
I just want a chance to apologize.
But take the story.
View from different angles.
Try to understand, me.

Sacrifice is a part of life.

It's supposed to be.
It's not something to regret.
It's something to aspire to.

Memories.

Why do you have to return at a time like this?
I'm just starting to enjoy and love my life.
But you returned.
With those regrets.
Now, I can't sleep.
I just want to cry.
Alone.

Lost love is still love.
It takes a different form, that's all.
But when those senses weaken,
Another heightens.
Memory.
Memory becomes your partner.
You nurture it.
You hold it.
You dance with it.
Life has to end.
Love doesn't.

Love,
Like rain,
Can nourish from above,
Drenching couples with a soaking joy.
But sometimes,
Under the angry heat of life,
Love dries on the surface and must nourish from below,
Tending to its roots,
Keeping itself alive.

Holding anger is a poison.
It eats you from inside.
But hatred is a curved blade.
And the harm we do,
We do to ourselves.

I hope you were there listening to my stories.
But it's okay.

I cried over a story book.
I don't have a reason to online anymore.
I lost myself.

The Undiscovered DeLon

Feeding Minds, Fighting Hunger

2009-07-13T12:11:00.007+08:00

Woot, everything went on quite well.
I'm amazed. =)
Hello, poor stomach.
Why didn't u make any noise at all throughout the 30 hours?!
Did you die? =/
Please don't die yet.
I will feed you pizza, soon.
So stay awake, stomach.
Everyone was tired.
Me too.
Yea.
She ignored me a lot. Great.
Thanks for making me less like her.
She was really tired anyway.

Who doesn't love that maze?
I got lost inside too.

Where is my worry?
Where is my pain?

Everyone is studying at school. Not exactly.
And I'm blogging at home. Great.

Look there! What is that?
Huh? *POKE* (Blood came out from my thumb.)
Wtf...
Who call you go look there? People call you look there then you also go look there.
...
Test wrong liao.
I need more blood.
Wtf... Again.

Stupid nurses and doctor.
Bully me.
Laughing at me for having protein deficiency.
Just because all my proteins are burned during the famine.
And all my medicines are vitamins and proteins.
Cool.

A stunning impact.
A blinding flash of light.
And then, nothing.

For a moment.
I feel like dying.
It would be better than suffering from unnecessary hunger and pain.

Enjoy your life today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow may never come...

Loving someone who doesn't like you is a pain.

Seriously.
You made me love you
I didn't want to do it
I didn't want to do it...
You made me love you
and all the time you knew it
and all the time you knew it...
Stop ignoring me.

I'm loving my life.
But I still hate the world. Sometimes.

The Hungry Pizza Lover

Hunger that will last for 30 hours...

2009-07-11T07:04:00.003+08:00

Ok, in the next 2 hours time,
I will be torturing my poor stomach.
Great.
I will murderize whoever that talks about PIZZA.
Seriously.
I hate being hungry.
I wanted to blog more,
But I don't think I have the time now,
And I forgot what I wanted to blog.
How great.
Ok, time to go.
God bless me. =)

The Going To Be Hungry DeLon